"We had guests over this past weekend & my mother in law phoned. My husband answered & explained politely to his mom that we had guests & that we would call her back. She later phoned us chastising us saying we should have taken her call. She went further to point out that she is the most important person in his brother & sister's lives & that they certainly would have talked to her, regardless of whether company was over. She even called both his brother & sister to "poll" them.

My husband & I stand firm... we feel it is just good manners to give your company undivided attention while they visit and to not take phone calls unless it is an emergency (which it wasn't).

Your thoughts?” Lorna, Canada

This is a very tricky situation as both parties feel justified that they are in the right. A Mom deserves your respect, (and you say that your husband spoke respectfully to his Mom) but respect needs to be earned.

By her taking offence at the situation in which you were placed does not show consideration for your guests nor for your predicament. When calling on the phone it is both polite and good etiquette to ask "Am I interrupting anything?" And then consider the options. Consideration for others is at the very core of good manners and is the antithesis of being controlling.

It certainly IS good manners to give your company undivided attention while they visit & to not take phone calls unless it is an emergency. We see far too many incoming calls being given priority to the exclusion of invited guests. It's deplorable and inexcusable!

Perhaps the use of an answering machine to 'screen' incoming calls when you do not want to be interrupted could prevent hurt feelings by people who wish to dominate others. Apologise anyway to bring closure to what could become a protracted stand-off. I hope you are able to kiss and make up.

Source: http://www.a-to-z-of-manners-and-etiquette.com/rage-page.html